Canadian Adult Sex Toys of Canada

Common Myths and Guilty Pleasure

Myth #1: My partner wants to use sex toys. I must be sexually inadequate.
Whenever buying (or considering buying) a sex toy, it's a good idea to consider the feelings of your partner. Discussing sex toys with your partner before introducing them into your sex lives is not only respectful, but in many cases quite necessary. Many people assume that sex toys are purchased to fulfill some sort of sexual inadequacy. This is most often not the case. Discuss your reasons for buying a sex toy with your partner; it's usually necessary to prevent any hurt feelings.

Most people buy sex toys because they're an enjoyable way to explore new possibilities. It's fun to explore sexual potential whether alone or with a partner.

Myth #2:  I'll get addicted to sex toys and won't be able to reach orgasm without them.
There's a very human propensity to become familiar with a particular form of stimulation. Whether it's cunnilingus from your partner, or vaginal penetration from your dildo, there are some forms of stimulation you count on to get you off. You can become addicted to your vibrator just as easily as you become addicted to a particular practice with your partner. It can happen, but you are not helpless to control and change it. Experiment with new positions, new toys, and new activities. Keep trying new things and you'll never be sexually dependent on any one particular practice.

Myth #3: Using a vibrator will cause damage to my genitals.
There's absolutely no physiological basis for such an argument. Vibrators can occasionally make genitals feel numb during or immediately after use but the sensitivity will always return. Experiment with different forms of stimulation during sex play to decrease any numbing effects.

Myth #4: My partner using a vibrator or dildo will replace me
Some men can be downright offended when their partner mentions buying a vibrator or a dildo, something that we have run across many times. In all actuality, there is nothing that can replace the love and affection for your partner. Using a sex toy or sex toys may actually strengthen your relationship and add to your love life in ways your never thought it would. Good communication between you and your partner goes a long way in any relationship.

Myth #5:  Using sex toys can be dangerous
Playing with sex toys are like anything, its all in how and maybe even when, your use them. If you are driving down the freeway wearing your remote control butterfly vibrator and your partner decides now would be a good time to test it out, sure, you are just an accident waiting to happen. AND you know how men are with remote controls, they just can't leave well enough alone. Common sense goes a long ways, like don't use your plug in magic wand near the bathtub. Also, keep your sex toys clean of bacteria and germs, by using good cleaning methods i.e. sex toy cleaning solutions, water or boiling will save you a ton of grief. Using condoms on your sex toys is a good idea if you are sharing with your partner. It is also a good idea to keep vaginal and anal sex toys separate.

Myth #6: I will loose my sensations if I use sex toys
We admit that after you have used a real powerful vibrator you may feel "it" is desensitized, wait a couple and minutes and the sensitivity will be back. Vibrators may actually increase sensations felt, as you will learn what sensations you like and therefore orgasm more easily. Some women may find they are too sensitive and may have to place a cloth or their hand between their genitals and the vibrators and let the vibrations go through that way.

Myth #7: They're only for people whose sex lives need help.
The fact that sex toys have been referred to as "marital aids" and "sexual aids" for so long has done much to further this myth. The word "aid" implies that you should only use one of these toys if you need to fix something that's broken. But a woman who finds that a vibrator helps her orgasm more easily is not broken, nor is a man who discovers that a cock ring helps his erection last longer. Individual sexual response falls on a vast continuum, and it fluctuates over one's lifetime. If we measured sexual performance against one single "ideal," we'd all end up "broken" at some time in our lives, and who needs to walk around under that cloud? I've always been a fan of the term "sex toy" because it reminds me not to take sex too seriously—it's hard not to smile when there's a butterfly vibrating one's clitoris. Sex is unpredictable, exciting, elusive, messy and playful, and sex toys make a natural addition to this wonderful mix.

Myth #8: Sex toys are unnatural

This stems from the belief that proper sex should involve only the equipment that you were born with. If you're strict about this, sex is bound to get a little boring. Forget the sexy lingerie, the romantic movie, the candlelight, the satin sheets, or the massage oil. All these things contribute to our experience of sex and are no more "natural" than sex toys, yet most folks don't have a problem with them. Take a tip from our ancestors who fashioned dildos out of stone or wood if you want something organic. Or just lighten up! I'm not suggesting you play with bio-engineered corn for heaven's sake.

Myth #9: Only single people should use sex toys.

The great thing about sex toys is that they add options to partner sex play-that back caress may feel even better when you follow it with the light touch of a feather, and that kiss may resonate even more deeply if your partner's hands are bound to the bed posts. Sex toys do fill in nicely when you are single, or when you do have a partner and he or she just isn't in the mood. Isn't it nice to have options?

Myth #10: If I use an ______ people will think I'm an _____. "If I use a butt plug, people will think I'm gay." Or "If I like dildos, then I must be a lesbian." "If I want to tie my partner up, I must be a dominatrix." Oh my, these are just wacky assumptions about sexuality. One thing I learned owning at a sex toy store is that all kinds of people have all kinds of sexual tastes, and they absolutely cannot be neatly compartmentalized based on sexual orientation. Sure lots of lesbians like dildos, but so does the woman who wants to have a dildo in her vagina while her husband anally penetrates her. Not all gay men like anal sex, just as not all heterosexual women like giving blow jobs. Your desire to try out a pair of wrist restraints doesn't mean you're headed for a career in BDSM, it just means you have a healthy sexual inquisitiveness! Your sexual identity defines who you are, not your sexual practices. So quit worrying what the Jones's might think, and just do what feels good!


Myth #11:  Sex toys are all made by sleazy men who have no idea about women's pleasure.
For many years the sex toy industry made its fortune preying off people's ignorance and shame around sex. Poorly made generic toys rolled off the assembly line and were packaged up for sale at the local adult store. Since no one would admit patronizing Al's XXX Love Shack, it's hardly surprising no one complained to the Better Business Bureau. Hubby might've purchased a vibrator for his wife on his last business trip, but it wasn't like he was about to return it if she didn't like it.

Thank god times are a changin'. Thanks to feminism, the sexual revolution, and the anonymity offered by mail order catalogs and web sites, women now comprise a much higher portion of the market, so toy makers are starting to pay attention to what women really want (as opposed to what men always thought we wanted). Not everyone wants a vibrator that looks like a porn star's penis, so advances there are now more colors and shapes, allowing shoppers these days to accessorize a leopard skin bag with a matching vibrator. Women wanted stronger vibrations on their clits, and the invention of the microchip yielded a crop of tinier and mightier toys. Women said "yuck!" to sticky, smelly, plastic dildos, so the industry answered with the invention of toys made from colorful jelly, cyberskin, and silicone.

Myth #12: They all look the same.
Say vibrator to most people and what they think of is the standard 7", penis-like rubber toy that dominated the scene for years. But a trip to an online store like Canadian Adult Sex Toys will clear up that misconception immediately. Want a vibrator that looks like a dolphin? A cock ring that looks like a bolo tie? A penis sleeve that looks like a flashlight? A vibrator to match your iMac?

Myth #13: I'd never be able to walk into an X-rated book store to buy a sex toy.
And you no longer have to. Thanks to the Internet, detailed product information, pictures, and articles about how to use these toys are just a click away. And reputable companies like MLMs Images offer generous return policies and privacy protections so all you have to worry about is whether you picked the right color.

Myth #14: Only raincoat wearing perverts buy sex toys.
This may be the image the media likes to project of sex toy buyers, but the fact that US consumers spent over $1 billion dollars on sex toys alone last year suggests that either we're all perverts or there's more to this stereotype than meets the eye. Chances are, if you buy sex toys today, you'll have something in common with your neighbor, the parent at the PTA meeting, or the girl, like me, who discovered their sweet charms one lazy summer.


Guilty Pleasure

Don’t play with yourself!”

It's a phrase that's been heard by far too many impressionable young children. When girls and boys start to discover their bodies it can be a source of much embarrassment for parents. Soon children consider the exploration of their private areas as bad, or even forbidden. And so starts the association between guilt and pleasure.

It does not end here, however. As the insecure adolescent enters high school, he or she is confronted by another social taboo. It is quite clear that it is not okay to talk about masturbation. Thoughts of social acceptance are paramount and it's important not to rock the boat. Self-exploration is a forbidden subject. Myths and rumors abound, leaving the adolescent alone in a world filled with questions and far too few answers.

Furthermore, teenagers are bombarded with moral admonitions against promiscuity and pre-marital sex, not to mention the ever-present fear of STDs and unwanted pregnancies that often go hand-in-hand with such behavior.

What all this leads to is an association between sexual pleasure and guilt. Sexual gratification - an eminently important and essential subject most people have a vested interest in - becomes relegated to the margins of polite society. Sex in all its glorious forms becomes clouded in a haze of misinformation and innuendo. Even a half-century after the publication of Kinsey's groundbreaking studies on human sexuality, North American society remains haunted by a nagging Puritanism.

It's easy to see where sex toys got such a terrible reputation. Up until about 10 years ago, you couldn't even find a book on sex toys. There were talked about in two-page summaries in sex manuals, which is hardly the treatment they deserve. A search at Amazon.com for "sex toys" produces a paltry 9 results. In many ways, sex toys are the final stumbling block on the path to sexual openness. Birth control, homosexuality, masturbation - these are all facets of sexuality that have by and large been brought out into frank and open discourse. Mention a vibrator, however, and you'll still elicit a few embarrassed giggles from those around you.

Sex toys are a completely healthy - dare we say natural? - way to explore sexual pleasure. Because of the society we live in, however, they continue to be a guilty pleasure. This is slowly changing. Mainstream media is starting to admit that sex toys do indeed exist ,and yes, people do use and enjoy them. From Citizen Ruth to Sex And The City, sex toys are slowly gaining acceptance.

So let the guilt slide off your back and..........

Go play with yourself!